Noticing Appreciation Languages at Work

Photo by brian.abeling

“Thank you for indulging my recognition.”

I laughed when I saw that text pop-up on my phone. After all, how often does someone recognize and then acknowledge that they expressed appreciation in a way that doesn’t match how you like to receive it? Let’s look at the complicated chain of events happening there:

  1. You did something (because you’re awesome like that)
  2. Person saw what you did and wanted to show appreciation (because they’re a great leader like that)
  3. Person expressed appreciation in the way that felt most genuine to them (+1 for authenticity!)
  4. You realized what they were doing and knew it was an appreciative act even though it didn’t resonate with you (+1 for appreciation awareness)
  5. Person remembered that you prefer a different form of appreciation and sent a message (+1 for relationship awareness)

Many employees feel underappreciated at work. That means step 1 takes place and the other steps might not happen. Actually, it’s possible that steps 2 and 3 occur but due to the appreciation language mismatch, you didn’t realize you were being appreciated. Oh no!

Gifts, words, physical touch, acts of service, quality time—what types of appreciation do you see in your workplace?

Allison Pollard

Allison Pollard helps overwhelmed technical leaders debug their management approach. She teaches them how to manage up, support people through change, and make time for strategic work. Her education in computer science, mathematics, and English from Southern Methodist University helps her connect technical work with people management. As a Certified Professional Co-Active Coach (CPCC) and Professional Certified Coach (PCC), Allison focuses on improving product delivery and leadership culture. Her experience includes work in energy, retail, financial, real estate, and transportation industries. Allison regularly speaks at global conferences like Scrum Gatherings and Agile Alliance's Agile20xx. She promotes women's leadership as the program director for Women in Agile's Mentorship program. When she's not working, Allison likes to drink lattes and listen to Broadway musicals. Allison is a proud glasses wearer and co-owner of Middlegame Partners.

http://www.allisonpollard.com
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